Debunking Couples Counseling Myths
When it comes to couples therapy, there are several misconceptions that keep couples from seeking help to improve their relationship. These myths often perpetuate negative stereotypes and hinder the potential benefits of professional guidance. Let’s shed light on the truth about relationship therapy and the value that professional couples counseling can bring to relationships. Couples therapy can be a valuable resource for cultivating a stronger, more fulfilling partnership.
Seeking couples therapy can be an effective, preventative step in cultivating healthy relationships.
Myth: All couples therapists are the same
Truth: Within the field of couples therapy, there are MANY different subsets, specialties, and modalities. Finding the right type of couples therapist to help with your goals is one important piece of the puzzle. You wouldn’t go to your allergist for a broken arm, would you? No. In the same way, working with a couples therapist who specializes in what you’re hoping to improve in your relationship will be more effective.
Myth: Couples therapy is a one-and-done type of treatment
Truth: If you’ve been to couples therapy in the past, it’s okay to want or need to go again in the future. I often use the illustration of a spiral staircase with my clients. As you ascend a spiral staircase, you can still see all of the stuff below, just from different angles. You might encounter new things as you keep going forward.
Life is that spiral staircase. Time propels us forward, and at different points, it’s totally appropriate to stop and re-examine different parts of our own history or face the current obstacles. It doesn’t have to mean that your previous therapy experience “didn’t work” or wasn’t effective.
Myth: Couples therapy is only for relationships in crisis
Truth: Couples therapy is an effective tool for all stages and types of relationships - from premarital couples to decades-long relationships. Relationship therapy can help whether you're experiencing minor conflicts, communication issues, trouble in the bedroom, or simply seeking to enhance your bond. Couples counseling provides a safe space for open communication, conflict resolution, and personal growth. It can help strengthen your relationship by providing valuable insights, teaching effective communication techniques, and fostering a deeper understanding of each other's needs and desires.
Myth: Couples counseling is a last resort to save your relationship
Truth: Seeking couples therapy earlier rather than later can prevent issues from escalating and provide a proactive approach to relationship maintenance. Contrary to popular belief, couples counseling is not solely reserved for relationships on the brink of collapse, and shouldn’t just be sought when you’ve exhausted all other options. It can act as a preventative measure, helping couples develop healthy coping mechanisms and strategies to maintain a thriving relationship.
And if it’s the case that couples therapy is your last-ditch effort to save your marriage, a specific type of relationship therapy called discernment counseling may be a beneficial first step. Couples counseling offers a supportive environment where both partners can address concerns, explore patterns, and learn constructive ways to navigate challenges.
Myth: Couples counseling focuses on blaming or fixing one partner
Truth: Couples counseling is actually a collaborative process where both partners are equally involved, and your relationship itself is considered the client. Couples therapists focus on improving your relationship dynamics and fostering mutual growth. Rather than pointing fingers, counseling sessions aim to promote empathy, understanding, and effective communication between partners. The goal is to create a supportive and respectful environment that allows both individuals to express themselves and work together towards a healthier, more fulfilling relationship.
Fun fact- this misconception is one of the reasons we have chosen not to accept insurance at Sea Glass. Insurance companies require that one partner be labeled with a mental health diagnosis (even when there isn’t one) and designated as the main client. This can cause further harm and damage to that person as well as create or perpetuate problematic dynamics within the relationship.
Myth: Couples therapy is a sign of relationship or personal failure
Truth: Choosing to pursue couples counseling demonstrates a commitment to growth and a willingness to invest in the relationship's wellbeing. Ever heard of the Duning-Kruger effect? It’s a phenomenon where people with low abilities overestimate their expertise. Not recognizing their own shortfalls causes them to miss opportunities for improvement. Intelligent folks recognize how much they don’t know and seek to improve. Many couples fear that seeking therapy implies their relationship is a failure - however, recognizing your shortcomings and seeking improvements is actually a sign of intelligence!
Seeking professional guidance is a sign of strength and an acknowledgment that every relationship can benefit from outside support. Couples counseling provides an opportunity for personal and relational growth, helping couples develop the skills and insights necessary for a thriving partnership.
Don’t let these myths keep you from getting the relationship help you deserve
Dispelling common myths about couples counseling is crucial for couples to realize the transformative potential it holds. By embracing the truth behind these misconceptions, couples can proactively seek professional guidance, fostering stronger communication, understanding, and a more fulfilling relationship journey together. At Sea Glass, we specialize in helping Christian couples improve their sex lives by decreasing pain and increasing pleasure and intimacy. Contact us today to see how we can help.
Sea Glass Counseling and Consultation is an EMDR therapy practice in Dublin, Ohio. Our compassionate, skilled therapists use evidence-based techniques grounded in the neurobiology of stress, trauma, and relationships to make sure your treatment is personalized and effective. Sea Glass therapists provide telehealth counseling in Ohio for individuals and couples. We’re best known for providing Intensive EMDR therapy, anxiety treatment, and sex therapy for Christians. Interested in working together? Contact us today to get started with a Certified EMDR therapist in Ohio.